putting out a black crewed, black cast superhero movie that's one of the best ever released,
leaving its haters with only one option:
watching every other MCU movie ever made.
"Hmm."
Just when you though Chadwick Boseman had called dibs on every black icon,
he's suiting up as Black Panther,
a superhero with the high-tech suit of Iron Man,
the all-natural steroids of Captain America,
and the invisible jet of Wonder Woman.
But one thing sets him apart from all the other MCU heroes,
Nope, it's 'cause this Marvel hero...
just...
won't...
quip.
"Help, people are shooting at me! Wait, let me put on my helmet."
"Enough."
"Ah."
"Like an antelope in headlights."
"Hehehehe."
Wow, his dad just died and he didn't even crack a joke?
I thought you had to be a smartass to save the world.
a combination of The Jetsons and a 1990's Jet magazine.
It's the source of all the world's vibranium,
it tops Tony Stark's tech and Doctor Strange's magic
as the BS that can do whatever the script needs it to do.
"There's vibranium on those trains?"
"There's vibranium all around us.
This secret kingdom has been hidden for centuries,
thanks to an iron-clad policy of...
asking people not to say anything.
"You speak nothing of this day."
But after sitting out the slave trade,
and a sentient AI using stolen vibranium to destroy the Earth,
they're finally ready to get involved.
And that one over there."
After taking 18 movies to get 6 quality villains,
cry as Marvel just takes 3 movies to cut it back to 2.
Andy Serkis's joyous portrayal of a guy who doesn't have to wear a mo-cap suit,
"That was awesome, that was awesome!"
Michael B. Jordan's Michael Jordan of Marvel villains.
He's the buffest dude to ever graduate from MIT
who's ripped for your pleasure
and who actually wins the moral argument and changes the hero's mind.
to turn your backs on the rest of the world!"
So wait, Killmonger was right?
I am not used to this much nuance in my Marvel villains.
Quick, make him choke an old lady so I know who to root for!
it's the women of Black Panther who do all the work,
who after all the debate between T'Challa and Killmonger,
was making the same case all along and never got the credit for it.
"Wakanda is strong enough to help others and protect ourselves at the same time."
Also, she saved the royal family.
Also, she saved the future of the Black Panther.
Wow, I am not used to this much agency in my Marvel love interest.
Quick, have her get rescued so I know who the heroes are!
"Get down!"
Phew!
So enjoy this movie with great acting,
and great culture significance
that almost lets you forget the underdeveloped love stories,
or the big, forgettable third act bruhaha.
You know, his heart's in the right place, but maybe don't let Everett Ross keep any guys with one arm in custody?